Patricia Smith Ranzoni, _A Give Away

.................................
A Give Away
.................................

for Annaliese

Months I've dreamed how to thank you.
Words, beads, threads float by.
I forget and our work does count for something.
Bread, among other ideas.

Words, beads, threads float by.
So many possibilities reflecting all that's you.
Bread, among other ideas.
Worrying and apologetic,

so many possibilities reflecting all that's you
remembering your Behind the Apron show.
Worrying and apologetic,
something flickers just right.

Remembering your Behind the Apron show
I recall mine prized all these years.
Something flickers just right—
time to give more away.

I recall my aprons prized all these years
not keeping up.
Time to give more away.
Multiply the having by not having any more.

Not keeping up.
Time to let more go.
Multiply the having by not having any more.
Know what I mean?

Time to let more go.
Give more away.
Know what I mean?
So this is for you.

"Give more away"
running through my mind,
this is for you, dear,
praying you'll treasure it, too.

Running through my mind,
through my forgetting,
praying you'll treasure it, too,
wish I knew its story before finding me.

Through my forgetting
I only know I've loved it
wishing I knew its story before finding me.
From some sale or fair.

I only know I've loved it
its handiwork clear.
From some sale or fair.
Some proud embroiderer.

Its handiwork clear
from scores of seasons ago
some proud embroiderer
her hands somehow passing to mine, now yours.

From scores of seasons ago
we can but fancy such a woman
her hands somehow passing to mine, now yours,
giving up this apron.

We can but fancy such a woman
seamstress of such finery
giving up this apron.
Sweet seive-sized checks, the shades of milk and toast.

Seamstress of such finery
not just any old apron.
Sweet seive-sized checks, the shades of milk and toast
its weave finely but homely spun.

Not just any old apron
you can say that again.
Its weave finely but homely spun.
Narrow panels joined selvage to selvage.

You can say that again.
Not as wide as today's fabrics, mostly synthetic.
Narrow panels joined selvage to selvage.
Like roller toweling, remember?

Not as wide as today's fabrics, mostly synthetic.
Sturdy cotton, yes, but no grain-bag marks.
Like roller-toweling, remember?
The way plain cloth used to be made royal.

Sturdy cotton, yes, but no grain-bag marks.
Even its cut seams over-stitched against fray
the way plain cloth used to be made royal.
Gathered so full and long for another time.

Even its cut seams over-stitched against fray.
What good dresses and skirts would it protect,
gathered so full and long for another time?
And isn't this a dainty narrow waist with fanning strings?

Do you have a good dress or skirt it might protect?
And what do you make of these miniscule stitches
securing this dainty narrow waist with fanning strings?
From one of the first machines?

I mean what could account for these miniscule stitches
too tiny and straight for fingers don't you think?
From one of the first machines?
But this cross-stitched border counted out over the hem!

Not too tiny and straight for fingers, these.
By hand, hints of diamonds square by square,
this cross-stitched border counted out over the hem,
row by faceted row under tired eyes.

By hand, hints of diamonds square by square,
hour after painstaking hour do you imagine she used a thimble
row by faceted row under tired eyes?
We know, don't we dear. See a speck of blood anywhere?

Hour after painstaking hour (do you imagine she used a thimble)
the reason we save such art where we find it.
We know, don't we dear (See a speck of blood anywhere?),
having done it.

How could we not save such art where we find it
(41 rows of flossed crosses!)
having done it.
Four feet of it she worked clear across the bottom.

41 rows of flossed crosses!
About 16 blocks of pattern repeats wouldn't you say?
Four feet of it she worked clear across the bottom.
2,738 stitches crossed with 2,738 more!

About 16 blocks of pattern repeats, yes?
After the hemming was done.
2,738 stitches crossed with 2,738 more!
A delicate checkered design like unsmocked lace.

After the hemming was done.
She'd never know what would become of her apron
her delicate checkered design like unsmocked lace
swirling above the toes of a Bucksport ballerina in Cinderella.

She'd never know what would become of her apron.
How I fetched it for a schoolgirl just before forgetting everything.
How it would swirl above the toes of a Bucksport ballerina in Cinderella.
How I'd decide to give it to a godmama apron-lover for safekeeping.

Remember I fetched it for a schoolgirl just before forgetting everything.
Because months I've dreamed how to thank you.
Dear godmama apron-lover, please keep this safe
because I forget and our work does count for something.

.................................
Patricia Smith Ranzoni
.................................

Next in ring: ...a poem in this room by poet 5 [stub]...
port/starboard
Back to AgD: Return to Agnieszka's Dowry Welcoming Room